When I resigned from work AGAIN, I know I’ll hear lots of questions and ramblings from people about it. Why did you resign? Why resign when you finally got regularized? Why leave a good paying company? Why oh whys?…Millions of whys…
Nothing’s new, it’s a cycle, it’s a routine and I’ve gotten used to it. It does not affect me as much as it did the first time, because I know what I’m doing, I know this is what I want to do with my life. I don’t have to explain myself to everyone, I don’t owe everyone an explanation and make them happy staying in a company (or any company) that would not make me happy in the long run. I know people do not understand, and I don’t care if they don’t because I do. Now, if all they can do is doubt me, so be it. I believe in me and for those who believes in me too will not get disappointed (I hope), either way, what matters is myself. Selfish. Some of you may think, do it! I have no control of your thoughts anyway.
Pretty much, it may seem that I’m affected writing about it but then again, I just wanted to share and make you (yes, you that never stopped questioning what I’m doing)all understand that all you have to do is focus with YOUR life and not mine. We all have our own thing, work on what you have, I’m working on mine.
I wanna share that you might say you’re just concern, but I think the other way around because if you are, you should have known long time ago that I don’t need your nagging advice, ALL I NEED FROM YOU IS BELIEVE IN ME, and I guess you NEVER did, because you never stopped and never accepted who I am(or you would not have to question millions of whys).
I am who I am, nothing more, nothing less. I am no longer the Lyndsay who achieves everything you want me to achieve, I’m no longer your kind of achiever. Let me introduce you who I am for those who claims knew me but really don’t.
Lyndsay now achieves everything she always wanted to achieve for herself, free spirited, doesn’t care what careful studies or surveys of some situation says and all she care is that she’s happy and loves what she’s doing where she is, where she’ll be, and where she’ll be going. Lyndsay now doesn’t care about your judgement, she cares about people who’s being judged. Lyndsay would not stay in one place for a long time(unless…?[hence, a secret]) and will always explore the world.
I don’t care if you rant to everyone how you’ve helped me then, I never forget, I just can’t pay you back in return THE WAY YOU WANT ME TO pay you back.
I hope you guys can learn to accept that we are not the same, and we will not have the same future. I may seem to be distant because I can feel those energies that doesn’t compliment mine building up. I don’t wanna be judged, just like how you don’t want to be either, so why do it? But like I said, I’ve gotten used to it… I’m just hoping to stop hearing it from the same people.
Just like any job I do, I wouldn’t want to be tied down to one place forever. I love my freedom, the simplicity of life, without the air of material world’s so called ‘Status’. Don’t tell me what do you do when I asked you “Tell me about yourself…” because I want to know you. If you don’t value what I love to do, what I want to do, let’s just not waste both of our times. Yet, if we’re lucky enough to have the same, then we’ll gonna have hell of a party lifetime!
Friends, family, colleagues, my best buddies, and those who talks like they know me… Some of you would claim you knew me, mostly won’t, but those who claims they don’t know me anyhow but enjoys my company, knows me well enough. I’m getting used to the cycle of your reaction… Keep asking me why? You’re just asking me “Why are you Lyndsay Cabildo?”… or should a simple answer, IT’S ME, will do. Didn’t I say, I’ll make this blog a li’l personal? It is now, isn’t it? 🙂